MiST on the Ghost Planet: "Target: Buttercup" Original story by Sailor Goon, MiSTing by Jen White [Space Ghost, Brak, and Zorak are sitting at a table in the Ghost Planet Industries cafeteria. Each is drinking from a coffee mug bearing his image. Brak looks very preoccupied.] Brak: Space Ghost, have you ever thought about your life? Ghost: Ummmmmmm... sure! Plenty of times. Zorak: Every time he battled me it flashed in fronna his eyes. Brak: I mean, y'ever think about what'cher doin' with your life, and think, 'What's it all about, when you really get down to it'? Ghost: Uhhhh... not really. Why, is something on your mind? Brak: Well, I've got three albums out, I almost got elected President, 'n there's a lotta web pages about me, but what'm I really doin'? Zorak: Wastin' your time if you don't get on the phone with your agent and find out why you're the only character Cartoon Network owns that hasn't been made into a beanie doll. Brak: Maybe there is more I could do for the world... Zorak: Uh oh, he's got that *look* in his eyes. Ghost: Like what? Brak: Maybe I shouldn't be a singin' space villain. Maybe I oughtta be- Zorak: A lumberjack? Brak: No! A superhero. [Space Ghost and Zorak do simultaneous spit-takes. It ain't pretty, especially for Brak, who is sitting in the middle. When they both manage to choke back their laughter Space Ghost speaks patronizingly.] Ghost: Brak, not everyone is cut out to be an avenger of evil, a doer of good deeds. It takes special qualifications. Brak: Like what? Zorak: Yeah, like what? Ghost: Wellll... you have to have your own costume. Brak: I got a costume. Ghost: You have to have super powers. Zorak: What can you do after you take off your belt and power bands? Ghost: [ignoring Zorak] Well... dangit, Brak, you don't have to be something you're not. You're fine being an... um, what are you? Brak: A space pirate. Ghost: Um. Zorak: [to Brak] Don't listen to Space Ghost. *Anyone* can be a hero these days! There's no secret to it. Ghost: Liar! Zorak: All ya gotta do is make up a goofy name and call yourself a hero, and you're in. Ghost: [desperately] Where'd you hear that? Zorak: Phfft. Everyone knows it. Remember the Powerpuff Girls? Ghost: [muttering] Oh, do I. Brak: Yeah! They're superheroes, and they're just little kids! Zorak: There ya go! Now, Space Ghost, if they let rugrats just out of their diapers be superheroes, then why're you crushing poor Brakums's dreams? Ghost: [to Zorak] You will not go to heaven. Zorak: Duh. Brak: I like the Power Puff Girls! Hey, I got a story 'bout them! Ghost: Well! Why don't we watch that, and talk about... things... later? Brak: All right, buddy! I got it right here! [Space Ghost's monitor squeakily lowers into frame beside the table. When it clicks into place, text appears on the screen.] Brak: Notice how I did that? Maybe I should be 'Segueman'!" Zorak: Oh brother. > Target: Buttercup > A PPG Fanfic by Sailor Goon > > > NARATOR: The city of Townsville... Ghost: Home to such up-and-coming businesses as Limited Incorporated. > Is at peace this night. Everyone is snug in their beds, Brak: With visions of sugarplums dancin' through their heads. Zorak: [talking as if in his sleep] Ugh... rrgh... allergic to sugarplums... > and all is right > with > the world. Ghost: This story'd better be a flashback, or it'd going to get pretty dull. > Whip pan into deep space; Brak: [Pan] Ow! Ow! Ow! I'm going, I'm going! Lemme get my spacesuit on! Jeez. > after a few seconds, we approach a small planet > in > the > Alpha Centari system. Zorak: Whoa. THAT was fast. Ghost: Perhaps those are Mainframe seconds? Brak: How long are Mainframe seconds? Ghost: Um... nobody knows for sure. Some people say a day, some people say thirty years. Brak: [singing] In a Mainframe second, ooo-ooo, everything can change... > As we descend into its atmosphere, and through the > clouds > To its surface, Zorak: We realize that we left our spacesuits behind on Earth, and choke to death in the poisonous atmosphere. > we fade into a massive trophy room, with thousands of > stuffed > animals, Brak: Wow. That guy musta played a LOTTA ring toss at Six Flags. > Skulls, and pieces of various lifeforms from throughout the universe on > display. Zorak: Six Flags over Kzin. > In the next room, we see a huge, hulking shape hunched over some kind of > viewer. > Ghost: [hulking shape] I *hate* the tiny screens on these laptops! > Narrator: Except for here... > Brak: Well, he *did* say all was right with the world. He didn't say which one. > We now are able to see who this Person/Thing is. > Ghost: Or we could, if there were pictures with this story. > NARATOR: OH, NO! NOT HIM! PLEASE DON'T LET IT BE HIM... > Brak: ["HIM"] Oh dear, *no!* I'm so *much* more chic. > HUNTOR: I'm bored... what can I hunt tonight, eh? Ghost: Ladies and gentlemen, may I introduce you to the plot. > He presses several studs on his control panel, and the monitor pans through > Dexter's Lab. > Brak: But Dexter doesn't notice the monitor floatn' all 'round 'cause he's trying to keep Dee-Dee from breaking everything. > HUNTOR: Rats! Monkey Isn't there... he was always a great hunt. Brak: What happened to Monkey? Ghost: He succumbed to... the dark side. Brak: You mean...?! Zorak: Yep. Mojo Jojo. Ghost: I'm only glad Blip Sr. didn't live to see it. > I could never > catch the little bugger, but he was always great sport... eh? > Zorak: Now he's hunting YOU with a laser cannon. > CONTROL PANEL VOICE: Mega powerful lifeforms detected...potential is high! > Repeat.potential is high! > All: Potential is high. > HUNTOR: Great! Locate and evaluate! > Ghost: [control panel voice] I *am* a highly advanced computer, with fuzzy logic and self-programming capabilities. I *can* understand something besides verbs and conjunctions, you know! > The monitor pans through the suburban home of the Powerpuff Girls and first > settles on... > Zorak: The desk behind her computer's old 14-inch, using it as camouflage. > CONTROL PANEL VOICE: Name: Blossom Utonium. Ghost: But we call her "Blutonium" for short. > Age: 6 months, although she has > the > body of a 5 year old. Zorak: A five year old Cabbage Patch Mutant. > Possesses an IQ of well over 275- > Ghost: Negative 275? This does not speak well of today's educational system. > HUNTOR: Nah! Too smart. It would be like hunting Noah Webster... Zorak: So much for that plan about getting her soul then, huh? > Next! > > The monitor pans over to a sleeping Bubbles, who is clutching Octi, as > usual. > Zorak: Some people toss and turn in their sleep, some grind their teeth. She strangles dollies. > CONTROL PANEL VOICE: Name: Bubbles Utonium. Same age as her sister. Ghost: And a very similar nickname, too: Butonium. > Possesses an IQ of about 60. Likes to color- > Ghost: Brak, I think you've found a friend. > HUNTOR: Move on! Not smart enough. > Ghost: [control panel voice] Perhaps you could have entered some *intelligence parameters* before you started the search, Mr. Fussy? > The monitor pans to Buttercup, who is actively, shadow boxing in her sleep. Zorak: I wonder if Professor Utonium ever wonders why Blossom and Bubbles always wake up bruised in the morning? > HUNTOR: Stop! This one intrigues me. More info! > Zorak: ThE MaStEr DeMaNdS iT. Brak: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! Ghost: ZORAK! We are *never* to mention that again! > CONTROL PANEL VOICE: Name: Buttercup Utonium. Age: 6 months. Ghost: [control panel voice] You've probably guessed about the nickname, so I'll just skip it. > Has a very short fuse. Likes to fight. Picks on sisters quite often. Anti- > Authority. Very clever and cunning. > Ghost: [control panel voice] Gang color, green. Suspected of selling black market rock candy to unsuspecting schoolmates. No criminal record - yet. > HUNTOR: (Excitedly) Yes! Perfect! Prepare Transporter and Power Reducing > Restraints. We'll take her now! > Brak: [Huntor] Wait! How much will the delivery charge be? And can I pay by check? > NARRATOR: Oh, No! Buttercup, Wake UP! > Ghost: [Narrator] No, no, Lupeta! Don't steal that doll! > HUNTOR: Shut up you, or I'll feed you to Sally over here laddie! She just > loves > to eat nosy do gooders. > Brak: Wha...? Is this one of those scary Sonic stories I've been hearin' about? > We see a shot of Huntor's feet, where a big, ugly saltwater crocodile is > eyeing > > The Narrator. Brak: [singing] I'll get right to the point, I don't gnash my jaws for every man I see... > (Off Camera) It menacingly snaps its jaws twice. > Zorak: Woulda been scarier if it'd done that *on camera.* > NARRATOR: Yaaaaah! > > We hear a loud thud off camera. > Zorak: It's the Blair Witch Project all over again. Brak: I got the Dramamine. > HUNTOR: Right. Thanks, Sally. He won't bother us again for a while, now, > will > he? > Oh yeah. Where was I? Ghost: Ranting to your pet. Standard villainous schtick number twenty-three. Zorak: Twenty-seven, actually. > Computer! Lock transporter on target, and beam her here. Now! > Brak: Then beam me a pizza! I'm *not* waitin' thirty minutes, even if it *is* free! > CONTROL PANEL VOICE: Are you shure? > Zorak: [control panel voice] You programmed me to beam things from other planets, but you can't even install a lousy spell-checker?! > HUNTOR: (Slightly Agitated) Stop arguing, and do it now. > > CONTROL PANEL VOICE: But sir... I think- > > HUNTOR: (Very Agitated) I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU THINK! DO IT NOW! > Ghost: [Huntor] That's it, I'm uninstalling Windows 2000 *tonight.* Crummy Plug and Play! > > Huntor spins round to face a large, flat wall mounted machine with a > restraint > system > That tailors itself to the anatomy of the selected target. Zorak: It's what every villain who is ANY villain is using now. > We hear a loud > buildup of power, > Similar to that old sound effect used to power up The Time Tunnel... > > All: Ooooh. > JUMP CUT TO THE PPG's BEDROOM; CLOSEUP ON BUTTERCUP: > Ghost: I don't think putting that webcam on her Speak 'n Spell was such a good idea. > Buttercup is feeling strange. Her body feels like it's building up some > kind of > static charge. She begins to twitch in her sleep. > Brak: But since she's asleep, she doesn't really feel any of this. > BLOSSOM: (sleepily) Buttercup? What's going on? > Ghost: I bet I know who didn't use fabric softener in the last load of laundry. > BUBBLES: (annoyed) Com'on guys- stop with the static, eh? > Brak: [Bubbles] Are you sticking balloons to the wall without me? > BUTTERCUP: (Now fully awake and scared) Guys? GUYS! What's happening to > me? > Zorak: Just scuff your feet in the carpet a while and then touch a doorknob. > BLOSSOM: (Yelling) BUTTERCUP! > All: TETSUO! > She cannot believe what she is seeing. Buttercup is vanishing into > nothingness > before her very eyes. > Ghost: Oh, I know this trick. Just watch, it'll turn out she's just covered herself with vanishing cream. > BUBBLES: (Hysterical, on the verge of tears) PROFESSOR! MOMMY! SOMETHING'S > WRONG WITH BUTTERCUP... WE NEED YOU! > Zorak: Nothing a few days in "The Box" wouldn't cure. > Both Blossom and Bubbles make a desperate grab for their sister, as she > slowly > fades > Into nothingness, a look of sheer terror and confusion on her face. > [Brak makes a "pop" noise with a finger in his cheek.] > Moments later, The Professor and Sandy (Ms. Keene) burst into the room, > Confused, and somewhat still asleep. > Ghost: Ludwig... Utonium. Sandy... Keene. Uh-oh. looks like one of those modern *hippie* households. > PROFESSOR: Girls? What's wrong? > He snaps on the light, and he and Sandy peer into the room. Blossom is > silent, > but > Trembling, struggling to maintain control. Bubbles is crying > uncontrollably. > Brak: [singing] She is the one called Sailor Moon. > BUBBLES: Buttercup's gone... I can't feel her anymore... She's- She's- > Ghost: [Bubbles] Not here! > Blossom: (choking back her emotions) no! I can still feel her, Bubbles... > Very faintly, but she's still alive! She's very far away... and in Trouble! > Brak: [Deanna Troi] I sense intense feelings of hostility. Zorak: Hostility. That's Buttercup, all right. > FADE TO BLACK > > FADE IN: > Ghost: Fade out, fade in. Make up your mind. > Slowly, Buttercup is waking up. > Ghost: She was awake before, but now she's REALLY awake. > BUTTERCUP: Wow! Whatta nightmare. Blossom? Bubbles? Zorak: Bubba? Brak: Bubela? Ghost: Babushka? Brak: Billy Bo Bob Brain? > She feels strangely weak. Then, she gets her bearings. She finds herself > strapped, spread eagle in some kind of restraint device, and a strange > metal > collar around her neck. > [All start singing Beethoven's Ninth Symphony] > Huntor is busy at his control panel, and hasn't seen her yet. > Zorak: [Huntor] Dum de dum dum... HEYYY! Kid on deck! > HUNTOR: Welcome to my Planet, Buttercup Utonium... I am Huntor, the mightiest > and > best stalker in this or any other Solar- Egad! > Brak: [Huntor] Hey! I was just rehearsing! I didn't expect you for another coupla minutes! > He turns to face Buttercup, who is struggling violently against the > restraints. Brak: She could just slip out, since she's got those squishy-looking arms and legs. > He instantly averts his eyes, noticing her condition. > Ghost: Awake? > HUNTOR: (yelling at the top of his lungs in anger) COMPUTER! MAKE UP SOME > CLOTHES FOR OUR GUEST, DAM%IT! She must be freezing, poor thing... > Why in Crantor's name did you beam her up Naked?!? > > Ghost: It is times like this I count my lucky stars that fan fiction only comes in text form. Zorak: Two words, Algernon. Davey-Kins. Ghost: Two words, windshield bait. Destructo ray. > CONTROL PANEL VOICE: She wasn't that way originally, master. I tried to > tell > you > That the transporter will only handle organic matter. > Zorak: So get her a cotton dress or a grass skirt or something! Yeesh. > HUNTOR: Never mind that. Just release her, and get her dressed! Now! > Brak: [control panel voice] I'm placing an order with Sears now. What's your credit card number? > The restraints holding Buttercup are released except for the metal collar. Zorak: She *likes* that part. It looks butch. > She > tries to fly at Huntor, Her temper at full, blind rage. With a shocked look > on > her face, she falls to the cold metal floor. Just then, she finds herself > in a > light green body suit. > Brak: I like footie pajamas too. > HUNTOR: Ok. That's better. Where was I? > > Buttercup rises to her feet (?) Brak: Well, I *guess* she does. I'm not sure. > and glares in hot raw anger at her captor. > Once > more she lunges for him, and does a facefault. > Brak: What's a facefault? Zorak: It's when your face splits in two right down the middle! > BUTTERCUP: (Mad enough to spit nails) Stop right there, whoever you are! > Where > am I? Where's my sisters? > Zorak: [Buttercup] Where's my supply of nails? > HUNTOR: As I was saying, welcome to my planet, Buttercup Utonium. I am > Huntor, > The greatest hunter in this or any other galaxy. You have been selected as > my > next > Target. In a few minutes, I will turn you loose in my private Jungle. You > will > have 24 > Hours to elude me. If you survive, I will give you your powers and your > freedom > back to you. If you don't-! > Ghost: [Huntor] Then we'll just keep trying until you get it right. > Huntor points to a trophy pedestal on his Fireplace mantle. The camera > swing-pans to it, following his finger. The pedestal is big enough for > Buttercup to pose on, and we see an inscription on it. It reads: > > > BUTTERCUP UTONIUM > KILLED AND STUFFED ON > THIS STARDATE, 12.22. 99 > Ghost: Heh heh. I bet he thought he was saving time and money by carving the year on there early. > > > BUTTERCUP: You think that I'm gonna participate in some sick alien's > Fantasy? No way! Zorak: Don't be too sure of that, kiddo. This *is* the Internet. > > > > HHUNTOR: (Very nonchalantly, as he pulls out an evil looking gun with about > 60 > different attachments on it, and points it directly at Buttercup) Zorak: Negaduck wants his Swiss Army Gun back now. > Ok then my little lady. I'll kill you where you stand. You have till I > reach > ten > To run out that door, and hide yourself... One. Three. Five... > Brak: [Buttercup] You're peeking! Cut it out! > CUT TO: > The Powerpuff Household, which is a beehive of activity. Professor > Utonium is on the phone to NASA, Ghost: [Professor Utonium] I don't care how much it costs! I'll get you the funding! Start research on interstellar travel NOW! > and Blossom is trying desperately to get > hold > of > Dexter. Brak: [Blossom] Ever since I beat him in the spelling bee he never answers my calls. > Bubbles is trying her best to comfort Sandy, who is crying. > Zorak: Which one is the bigger load? You make the call! > BUBBLES: (On Sandy's Lap) don't cry, Mom. At least we know she's still > alive. > Zorak: [Bubbles] Don't ask me how I know that. I just do. > SANDY: But where is she? Who's got her? And what horrible things are > happening > to her? > Zorak: I see she's read some of these Internet stories too. Ghost: [warningly] Zorak... > BLOSSOM: (Hanging up phone) Mom, I'd be more worried about the Kidnapper Ghost: Don't you mean... Kidnappor? > than > Buttercup right now... Professor, you can hang up the phone. Zorak: [Blossom] I'm sick of you listening in on my calls to Dexter! > Mom, Bubbles > and I > are going over to Dexter's Laboratory. He's not going to be in today, but > he's > gonna let me use the lab to track down Buttercup, and save her, if we can. > Ghost: Dexter left all *that* on his answering machine message? > PROFESSOR: (Still on phone) Ok, girls... But I'm gonna keep trying at NASA. > We > need a backup plan, ok? > Zorak: I bet he's going to get them to make a giant robot. Like giant robots are the answer to EVERYTHING! Ghost: Aren't they? > BLOSSOM: Right! Ok, you two, let's go! Mom, I know it's painful for you, > but > we can really Use Powerpuff Mom right now... > Brak: Um, is this gonna be about Powerpuff girl talk? > CUT BACK TO PLANET CRANTOR: MIDDAY: > Buttercup, despite her vastly weakened state, has managed to keep one step > ahead of Huntor. She is tired and hungry. She has tried several times to > remove > the Power Restraint Collar that Huntor put on her, but every attempt has > been > worthless. Zorak: Wait a minute! We've been watching the Powerpuff family support group when we coulda been watching an alien hunting a kid down like an animal? What a rip! > Her hope right now is to survive the next 17 hours, when Huntor said that > the > collar would drop off, and she would be free. Zorak: Little did she know that the hours on Crantor are twelve Earth years long! BWA-HA-HA-HA! > And when she was... she fully > intended to > Make this Huntor character Black and Blue, and Red all over. > Brak: [Buttercup] I'm gonna give him a tattoo he'll NEVER forget! > HUNTOR: (Over Bullhorn, In distance) Ghost: [Huntor] Be vewy vewy quiet. I'm hunting toddlers. > Very good, Buttercup. You're proving > to be > more of a challenge than I hoped for. Now, ask yourself: Can you survive > another 17 hours? > Ghost: [Buttercup] Every other cartoon character in this kind of story does, why can't I? > BUUTTERCUP: (To self, as she once again sets about once more to free > herself of > the collar) Ok, Huntor, ask yourself this: Can you survive my revenge once > I > get this F#$%^*G Thing off!!!!!!!!!! > Brak: Uh oh. They better use Dexter's Rude Remover on her when they get her back. > > CUT TO: Ghost: Size, leaving adequate fabric for seam. > DEXTER'S HOUSE; INTERIOR: DEXTER'S BEDROOM, IN FRONT > OF THE BOOKCASE ACESS PORTAL; 12:00 HOURS: Ghost: All right, all right, we get the picture! No need to yell. > Blossom, Powerpuff Mom, and Bubbles are standing in front of the bookcase, > Blossom > Trying to remember what books Dexter told her to tilt. > Zorak: [groans] We could be here a while. > BLOSSOM: (Frustrated after several attempts to remember the sequence) > #@%! We haven't got time for this! Stand Back, you two! > Brak: I hope Dexter's got good insurance... > With a Burst of strength, Blossom rips the bookcase, and the access door > behind > it off it's hinges, and throws the entire assembly through the roof of > Dexter's > house, and all 3 step into the lab. > Ghost: Hulk SMASH! > COMPUTER: Welcome, Blossom Utonium, and Bubbles Utonoum. You are > reconized. Brak: 'Cause everybody else uses the *door*. > Total access granted. Where is Buttercup? > Zorak: Meet the friendly neighborhood Plot Device. > BLOSSOM: (Moving to the mainframe control) That's what we need your help > on. > Scan our home, and report anything unusual. > Ghost: [Phong] First you must defeat me at my favorite game, my child. > COMPUTER: Scanning... this will take a few minutes... Blossom, who is your > guest? > She is not recognized by this system, and therefore may constitute a > security > breach. > Brak: [Computer] I shoulda thought of that before. Oh well, silly me! > BLOSSOM: (Agitated) That's our Mom, Computer. I'll accept responsibility > for > her clearance to be here. > Brak: [Computer] Is she Sugar, Spice, Everything Nice... or Chemical X? > COMPUTER: Granted... Results of scan. I have picked up a faint Transporter > Ion > trail, which leads from your bedroom to a small planet in the Alpha Centari > system Ghost: Wow! I bet if Hansel and Gretel had had a pocketful of ions, they would never have gotten lost in the woods! > It is class M, and capable of life support. > Ghost: [Computer] The weather there is currently seventy-eight degrees centigrade, with winds from the southeast at ten to fifteen miles per hour. > BLOSSOM: (Concerned and confused) You mean Buttercup is in deep space? > Zorak: I thought *Bubbles* was the stupid one! It *said* planet! Hel-LO! > COMPUTER: The evidence is clear. Would you like to be beamed there? > Brak: [Computer] I can do that, you know, 'cause I'm a computer. > BLOSSOM: (Surprised) You mean Dexter has a transporter system here? > > COMPUTER: Of course... doesn't every boy Genius? > Brak: [Mandark] But I have a bigger, faster transporter that will take you through time as well as space! Ha-ha! Ha-ha! > BLOSSOM: Fine! Can you beam all 3 of us there? > > COMPUTER: Yes... I do not foresee a problem. I can beam all three of you > there, > And safely bring back four. > Zorak: In case one of you gets cut in two. > BOSSOM: Great! Let's do this. > > COMPUTER: I will set Transporter Systems to Autopilot, to retrieve you at a > time > You specify. Zorak: When hell freezes over o'clock. > > BLOSSOM: Beam us there, and give us ten hours. > Zorak: At three hundred and fifty degrees. > COMPUTER: Here... take this. It's a wristband subspace radio. With it, you > can > Stay in contact with me. > Ghost: Or with Dick Tracy. Either way. > BLOSSOM: (Putting it on) Ok. Get us up there! NOW! > Brak: [computer] All right, all right! Sheesh, someone's feelin' bossy. > A Green glow surrounds Blossom, Bubbles and Sandy, Ghost: REBOOT! > as the transporter sends > them on their journey to rescue Buttercup. > [Zorak improvises any guitar instrumental from "Heavy Metal."] > COMPUTER: (Repeating every 30 seconds) WARNING! TRANSPORTER SYSTEMS > OPERATIONAL! CANNOT BE DEACTIVATED EXCEPT UNDER DIRECT VOICE COMMAND OF > BLOSSOM > UTONIUM... Ghost: D'oh! NOW it tells us! > CUT TO: > PLANET CRANTOR; 14:00 HOURS: > > SCENE: HUNTOR'S CONTROL CENTER. THE SAME AREA BUTTERCUP WAS > BEAMED TO, HOURS AGO... > Brak: Y'know, since this is just a story, they don't *have* to use the same backgrounds over and over to save money. > We see Blossom, Bubbles, and Powerpuff Mom (Sandy) Ghost: In case you had forgotten who she is. > Take shape in the now empty Control Center. They slowly take form, and > Solidify. As they do, they quickly tense up, eyeing the entire area with > anxiety Zorak: With eyes like the Power Puff Girls have, they could eye the entire situation without turning their heads. > And antici All: SAY IT! > pation. > Ghost: Don't you just love the classics? Zorak: You mean the tired old cliches? > BLOSSOM: Split up, and look for clues! > Zorak: Speaking of which... > BUBBLES: Right! > > POWERPUFF MOM: (exclaiming) Kids! Over here! I see something! > Ghost: [Blossom] Mom, you're supposed to split up, THEN find clues! > BLOSSOM: Shure thing! > > BUBBLES: What is it, Mom? > > They join her in Huntor's Living room, and Blossom gasps in fear and > disgust, > and > Bubbles Lets out a terrified scream. > Ghost: They had just realized that they had committed the crime of breaking and entering. > POWERPUFF MOM: Dear God. > Brak: [Powerpuff Mom] Please bring Buttercup back. And world peace, if ya got time. > BLOSSOM: This creep is some kind of predator. > Zorak: How can ya tell? Tooth marks on the silverware? > BUBBLES: (Terrified) Blossom... Mom.... LOOK! > Brak: [Bubbles] I can juggle! > Six sets of eyes stare at the pedestal that sits on the mantel. > > POWERPUFF MOM: NO! > Ghost: A PEDESTAL on a MANTLE! That thing already reaches the ceiling! How're you going to put anything on top of it?! > BUBBLES: (Clutching her stomach) I think I'm gonna be sick. > Brak: Oh, it's not *that* bad. Just take it down and put it *beside* the mantel. > BLOSSOM: No, you two! She's here somewhere on this Rockball, and she needs > our > help! I don't understand, but something is very wrong here! If Buttercup > were > okay, she would have disposed of this creep as soon as she was brought > here! > Ghost: [Blossom] Don't ask me how I know all that! I just do! > NARRATOR: (Having recovered his wits a few hours ago) Blossom, you don't > know > just how right you are! > Brak: I bet the Narrator told her. *That's* how she knows. > CUT TO THE JUNGLE, ABOUT 10 MILES FROM HUNTOR"S COMPLEX: Zorak: Straight up. The cameraman plummets to his death. > Buttercup is laying on the ground, her strength gone, and her spirit > broken. Ghost: NO! Go into Game Sprite mode before it's too late! Zorak: What ARE you talking about? > Huntor is kneeling over her, ready to administer the coup de grace. He > grabs > her by the > Collar, and: > Brak: Says that he was just kidding, 'cause it's mean to beat up on little kids, and anyway BS&P is making him. > HUNTOR: Well, my fine little quarry, Ghost: [Huntor] You are MINE now! Brak: [Huntor] No ifs, ands, ORE buts about it! Zorak: [Huntor] You don't have a chance in SHALE of getting away! > you put up a great fight... I shall be > forever in your debt. But you have lost, and I have won. You'll make a fine > trophy. > Zorak: Bronze her and stick her on a block of wood. Give her away at the next bowling tournament. > Suddenly, from behind him, he hears three voices from He Double Hockey > Sticks > that sends chills up and down his spine: > Ghost: ["HIM"] Well, we meet again, dears! > BLOSSOM, BUBBLES, AND POWERPUFF MOM: > PUT THE GIRL DOWN. NOW! > Brak: Um, they don't got her. Huntor does. > Huntor drops Buttercup out of sheer fright, and turns to face what he knows > to > be certain death. Brak: Slowly I turn, step by step, inch by inch... > It suprisingly doesn't come. Ghost: So he didn't *really* know it, he just kinda suspected it. > All he sees are Two Very > angry > Powerpuff Girls, > And one extremely angry Powerpuff Mom, hovering over him. > Zorak: And he gets out the flyswatter. Ftwang! > BLOSSOM: I'll take care of this goon. You two see if Buttercup is ok. > Ghost: She's lying on the ground, her strength gone and her spirit broken. How okay does *that* sound?! > Bubbles and Powerpuff Mom do so, both crying and sobbing. > Ghost: Who says that heroes can't have their tender emotional side? Zorak: Still getting "contributions" from the Wusses Association? > POWERPUFF MOM: (Gently picking up Buttercup, and hugging her) > Baby... thank God you're alive. We all thought- > Brak: That the "Monopoly" guy really *does* make a great mayor. Zorak: That you had been skipping kindergarten again. Ghost: That Professor Utonium's mother was a ruler. > BUTTERCUP: (A bit peeved) Com'on you two, don't get mushy on me. I'll be > fine. Brak: Fortunately she had a spare spirit with her. > Just > Get this EFFING thing off my neck. Okay? Please? > Zorak: [Buttercup] Ya think ya can MANAGE that?! > BLOSSOM: Ok, I've got nature boy here trussed up. Ghost: What? A heroic battle with the villain took place, and I *missed* it?! > He'll have to come back > with > us to face Kidnapping charges, > Brak: Kidnapping, with a real kid. > assault, and- > > HUNTOR: (Protesting) No! I am a resident of Crantor! Earth justice does not > apply to me. I demand that you release me immediately, and leave my world. > Ghost: Ooooh, he's got a point. Does Crantor extradite? > BUTTERCUP: (Struggling in anger, as Powerpuff Mom Is working on breaking > off > the > Power Restrainer) NO! LEMME AT HIM! ALL I WANT IS 30 SECONDS, OK? > > BUBBLES: YEAH! Let Her go, Mom! > Zorak: [rubbing his hands together] BS&P, go take a hike! > POWERPUFF MOM: (As she finally rips off the collar, and sets Buttercup free > of > its influence.) Now girls, I'm afraid Mister Huntor is right. Earth laws do > not > apply to him. Zorak: [Powerpuff Mom] But butt-kicking is not in the law either, so GET HIM! > But, Crantorian law doesn't apply to us, either. Blossom... Bubbles... Let's > head > back to the control center, and leave Buttercup alone with the nice man for > awhile... I'm shure that they have much to talk about. > Ghost: Wellll... it may not technically be justice, but it works poetically speaking. Zorak: Sez the guy who blew up a whole planet full of Gargyloids just because he didn't like their idol! Brak: Whoa. That's *gotta* be against the Prime Directive. Ghost: [Defensively] I was young then. And, anyway, the statute of limitations on planet destruction is ten years. > BUTTERCUP: (Gleefully) Thanks, Mom. I won't be too long... > Ghost: Oh, that lovable little vicious, vengeful tot. I just want to go out and buy an armload of green-eyed dolls now. > POV: Buttercup is slowly turning towards the still bound and gagged > Huntor, > his eyes > Wide in terror, as Buttercup slowly moves toward him, step by step, inch by > inch. > All: NIAGRA FALLS! > NARRATOR: Oh, no! I can't watch! > Zorak: I can! Lemme see! > SLOW FADE TO BLACK, AS BUTTERCUP POUNCES ON HER TARGET, AND WE HEAR LOUD > SOUNDS > OF FIGHTING IN THE DARKNESS. > Ghost: [singing] B S & P, we're living with B, S & P... > NARRATOR: (Through darkness, as the sounds of fighting and muffled screams > continue) So once again, the day is saved... By Dexter's Laboratory? > > THE END [The text scrolls off the screen. The monitor goes staticky, then squeakily rises out of frame as if it knows it is no longer needed.] Brak: See! Even little kids can be superheroes! Ghost: Well, uh... Zorak: Little kids can also be hunted like animals. [sighs] Just like home. Brak: [doubtfully] That sounds kinda dangerous... Ghost: Yes! Yes it is. Being a hero is *dangerous.* Day in and day out, dealing with villains, the worst scum of the galaxy... no offense, guys. Zorak: None taken. [evil snicker] I *know* what I am. Brak: I didn't think about that. Zorak: Don't bother with it, Brakums. Being a hero ain't all it's cracked up to be. Take it from Batmantis. Ghost: Yeah. Zorak: Ya don't get the girls in real life. Instead, ya get saddled with some lame-o sidekicks. Ya end up as a total loser! Ghost: Yeah - HEY! How did you know about Batmantis?! That was in a *dream* I had! Zorak: [at a loss] Um... er... Brak: Maybe I ought to be content with what I am after all. Zorak: Uh... right! If you're a doofus, be the best darn doofus you can be. Brak: [proudly] And I'm pretty gosh darned good at it! Ghost: Yep. When we need a doofus, we know who to come to. Brak: Thanks. [sniffling] You guys... you're the greatest. Group hug! [Both Space Ghost and Zorak hesitate.] Zorak: Try it and die. Ghost: Not until someone hoses Larva Boy there down. Brak: [cheerfully] Okay. / | | / |/| / | | / ___________|/|____________ | ______________________ |\ | |J#~#-####*###-##*###+#| | | | |##*#.##-#.##-#.##~##*#| | | | |##+###+##~##+###+#*###| | | | |##-#.##+##.-###-####-#| | | | |#-###-###+#W######-## | | | | |##~#*###-*###*#+#.####| | | | |###~#+#~.##-######~###| | | | |##-#*###-#*~##-#~#.##%| | | | |##+##*#+##+#-##.###+##| | | | |#~##*#####-###~*####*6| | | | ________________________ |/ This MiSTing is copyright (c) by the author, JenWhite6@aol.com. "Target: Buttercup" is copyright (c) by "Sailor Goon". All Space Ghost and Powerpuff Girls characters are copyright (c) Hanna-Barbera. This MiSTing was done in the name of fun, and no malice is intended to anyone. Many thanks to "Sailor Goon" for letting me MiST his fic! > Why in Crantor's name did you beam her up Naked?!?